The Golden Floor
by GraveDancer
Summary: What if Derek had entered Meredith's life when she got back from Europe, before med school, before Derek was ever married or a famous surgeon? A slightly AU Mer/Der fic.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I write Grey's Anatomy fanfics because I don't own the show. If I owned the show, I clearly wouldn't have to write fanfics.**

**So here it is....my new fic! As the description says, it's slightly AU. What would have happened if Meredith had come back from Europe and found Derek in her life already? What would that have been like for both of them. So here it is, the first meeting. **

**Enjoy!**

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I had been Mark Sloan's bitch from the second he had figured out that he was going to be bigger than me.

It wasn't something I was about to admit out loud, not even to my mom. It wasn't even something I usually admitted in my own head but now I was stuck in the middle of an overly crowded waiting area at the airport waiting for someone that I had never even met before, so right now, I was allowed to call myself Mark's bitch in my own head. I hated airports. I might be a romantic at heart, which meant I should probably like the ideas of hellos and goodbye that the airport brought, but it also brought crowds of people, too much noise and long line ups. I hated airports and yet here I was, standing in an airport just because my idiot of a brother had called me that morning.

_Shep, can you pick up Lexie's sister at the airport around ten? I got called in and Lexie has class so unless you want to leave a hot chick kicking around, go get her. Thanks, man._

Only my idiot of a brother would use the temptation of a hot girl to try to get me to do something I didn't want to. Not that that was I was here, I wasn't about to be interested in Lexie's crazy big sister that had spent the last year back packing through Europe. And Mark had never even see a picture of the girl so she wasn't actually guaranteed hot. I was just here because I was Mark's bitch.

And I actually kind of liked Mark's newest girl and she had lasted more than a month even if she was far too young for him.

So here I was, stuck in this hell hole known as Seattle-Tacoma International Airport waiting for a girl that I did not know or care about just because I happened to be Mark Sloan's bitch.

After today, after I was done this chore of his, I should probably just off myself.

"God damn it!" a voice came from behind me.

I turned around at that. I'm not sure why. People swore all the time, girls swore all the time, especially in airports. I swore in airports. I would even swear in front of my nieces and nephews in the airport if it was this crowded. But for some reason I turned around to see exactly who it had been.

I couldn't help the smile that spread across my face.

She was beautiful. Actually beautiful wasn't exactly the word to describe her, not that she wasn't but she wasn't exactly what I had figured to be beautiful until this moment. She was more of a mess than she was beautiful or…I wasn't even sure how to put it. Except she made me smile and I wanted to keep looking at her. Her golden hair, because as odd as it sounded golden was the only way I could think to describe it, was falling out of its pony tail. Her long sleeved t-shirt was wrinkled from the flight but the jeans were perfect, completely perfect and hugged her ass in the most alluring way. I had to actually concentrate to not laugh at her shoes, because somehow I hadn't expected the simple black converse. I needed to see her eyes but she was looking down at her cell phone and I couldn't make them out.

"Stupid…stupid phone," she frowned, jabbing at some buttons. "You…what's the point of this stupid thing if it's not even going to let me make a stupid call? This is stupid…stupid, this entire thing was stupid. And now I'm going to grow old here. I'm never going to get out of here and I will die in this airport like that stupid movie because this stupid stupid phone…"

"Excuse me?" I interrupted the rambling, as adorable as it was.

"What?" the woman snapped.

"I just…cell phone reception is usually kind of spotty here," I explained, shrugging slightly as I tried not to smile. Green, her eyes were the most interesting shade of green I had ever seen. And I was pretty sure she was going for the angry look except for she looked more adorable than she actually looked menacing. I wasn't going to say that to her.

"Here as in this city here or here as in this airport here?"

"Airport."

"Oh," she frowned, chewing on her bottom lip. I decided to ignore the images that suddenly flooded my mind of chewing on that lip for her, pushing her against the wall and clothes falling to the floor. Definitely ignoring those images. "Crap."

"Crap?" I smirked.

"I…" she groaned and then giggled. I was now just not only Mark Sloan's bitch but I wasn't even sure I was a man. Because I wasn't picturing chewing her bottom lip anymore, I was…picturing laying in bed with her, early in the morning and just listening to the sound that had somehow made my heart skip a beat. There was nothing manly about that vision. "Did you just smirk at me?"

"Maybe. It depends on if you liked it or not."

"Figures," she rolled her eyes. "I'm stuck, I'm stuck in a stupid airport and I don't even like airports. I'm stuck and lost and all I found was a guy trying to get in my pants. This…this is why I shouldn't have come here."

"I might be able help."

"Help?" she frowned, her eyes narrowing. "How could you help? Unless you have a cell phone with super power reception or know where the hell my sister is, which is…I'm not sure she should still be called my sister after today but whatever. I don't think you can help."

I paused. Because suddenly she did kind of look like her.

"Wait…are you Meredith Grey?"

"How do you know my name?"

"I'm here to pick you up."

"I…I've heard some pretty bad pick up lines in my life, nameless person, but that has to be the worst," she giggled slightly, turning to walk away.

"What?" I frowned, moving quickly. "No, I mean. Lexie, your sister is dating my best friend. Lexie is in class and Mark had to work so they sent me to come pick you up. I'm Derek by the way, Derek Shepherd."

"This…this figures," Meredith groaned, rolling her eyes again. "Stupid, I know this was stupid."

"Because I'm here to pick you up?" I frowned.

"No, it's just…it's long and messy and complicated and you don't want to hear it."

"I'm a good listener."

"I…I don't care, I don't care if you…it doesn't matter," she shook her head. "What matters is if you can carry my bags. Can you carry my bags?"

"Of course I can," I nodded.

"Good," she nodded, dropping both of them by her legs before turning to walk toward the exit. "Can we go? I hate airports."

"We can go," I laughed moving behind her.

Meredith Grey. I hadn't expected that, not that I had had any idea what to expect but it certainly hadn't been the beautiful woman I had just met. I hadn't actually expected the attitude either, the attitude that partially made me want to groan and hit her and the other part just made me want to laugh. She was something. That was as far as my brain would go, that Meredith was actually quite something.

That and I had a feeling my life was never going to be the same again.

_And you stood there in front of me just _

_Close enough to touch _

_Close enough to hope you couldn't see _

_What I was thinking of_

**So there you have it. The first update and a little more info. This clearly takes place right after Meredith came back from Europe, except things are a little different than they are on the show. Lexie's already part of Mer's life, and a little bit older than she would be according to show time line. Derek and Mark are already there too. And Derek and Meredith met at the airport, thanks to Mark and Lexie and Derek...Derek likes what he sees. And what he hears. And he knows things, or at least he knows he feels things. Okay, that's all I have to say. The rest, you will see. **

**I'll hopefully get another update up tomorrow. **

**Read. Love. Review.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I don't own Grey's Anatomy. If I did...well I love this season so I wouldn't change much but there would probably be more Derek or something, cause he's Derek.**

**Sorry this took a bit longer than planned...I had quite the crazy week with work and it was my birthday last Thursday (24...eee god) so I went out of town over the weekend to celebrate but here it is now. And I'm sure that you will see that it's slightly different from the last one...and you will see how really quickly.**

**Enjoy!**

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I had gone to Europe to find myself.

Instead I had found a lot of other things. Like I had found out exactly why an orgasm in French was a petit mort, because it really kind of felt like one. And that the English seemed really conservative but once you got them in bed, it was a completely different story. I had learned lots about men, lots of different kind of men and found a lot of different kind of alcohol. Which now made me sound like a crazy wild slut which I'm not, I swear I'm not. I don't actually know who I am but I'm not that girl, I just…had a good time. But I did learn things and saw lots of important historic stuff and none of that was even the point, the point was, I went to Europe to find myself and I had failed miserably.

Which is why somewhere above the ocean, somewhere between Seattle and London, I had decided that for a bit at least, I was going to completely give up on men.

That is why it figured that the very first man I had met after having my feet on actual ground again was the most beautiful person I had ever seen.

"So how was Europe?" he asked as he threw my bags into the back of the car.

"It was…good," I nodded quickly, trying really hard to pretend that my eyes weren't glued to his ass. He had a little less meat on him than I usually went for but his ass was perfect. He actually had the perfect ass. "Good and…fun, good and fun and educational."

"That's good," Derek smirked again. At least I was pretty sure his name was Derek. When he had figured out who I was and had introduced himself his eyes had done this really weird thing that had made them look bluer or softer or something and my head had gone foggy and I was pretty sure he had said his name was Derek. He looked like a Derek.

"My brains tired," I admitted as I climbed into the passenger seat of his slightly beat up car. "Sorry."

"It's okay," he shrugged as he got in.

"Long flight," I sighed, looking over at him and suddenly realizing that Derek whatever his last name was because I had definitely not been able to remember that wasn't actually all that beautiful. His hair was all over the place. It was a big curly mess that kind of went all over his head and I wasn't sure he had every been introduced to any sort of hair product. His nose did a weird hooking thing at the bottom and seemed maybe just a little too big for his face. And now that he had pulled sunglasses on over the really blue eyes, it was like the magic had disappeared.

And then my brain, which I was actually starting to consider very tired indeed, had a flash of pulling on the curls in the middle of a petit mort and he was kind of beautiful again.

"Hmmm…" he nodded. "I've never been to Europe."

"You haven't?"

"No," he sighed. "Had to work to pay my way through college and med school, didn't have the money. And now my residency keeps me too busy."

"You're a resident?"

"Yeah," he nodded. "Well actually an intern."

"Surgery, right? Not something completely lame?"

"Surgery," he nodded, another smile spreading across his face. "Going to be a neurosurgeon."

"Oh," she breathed. "That's…impressive."

"I know it is," he laughed and suddenly the entire car sounded warm and alive or something. Which was nuts, sounds didn't make things come alive. They didn't. It was just a good laugh, a really strong beautiful laugh that matched him. It was warm but that didn't mean it made the car warm.

"Of course you could be lying and just say that to get the girls to sleep with you," I giggled.

"Would that work?"

"Probably."

"Is it working with you?"

"So I was right," I giggled, kind of surprised with myself. I didn't giggle with boys. Or I did. I giggled with boys a lot but I usually had some alcohol in me. "You just want to get into my pants."

"I don't even know you," he laughed again.

"And that stops you? Because that doesn't stop many men."

"It stops me," Derek shrugged.

"Hmmm…" I nodded slowly. Derek was different, he was definitely different. I barely knew him but I was pretty sure he was really different than most of the guys that I met, or most guys period or something. He seemed different. Which probably had a lot more to do with the long flight than anything else, the long amount of time spent in a tiny cramped space without enough oxygen probably was a really good explanation as to why he seemed different and something and why I couldn't stop thinking about how beautiful he was.

"I was raised right," he shrugged.

"If you say so," I giggled softly, noticing the soft smile that spread across his lips.

"So really, what was Europe like?"

"It was nice," I smiled softly. "It's…it's strange because they're like us but they're not like…they're different. I mean, they're people but they're not people people which kind of makes them sound like aliens which they're not but you it's different….I'm not making any sense. I know this. I ramble and I make no sense and feel free to tell me to shut up."

"They're like us but they're different."

"You got that?"

"I got that," he grinned widely.

"That's…that's impressive," I giggled softly. He was impressive. Derek whatever his last name was was very impressive and beautiful. "So…your best friend is the guy Lexie is dating."

"Yeah, Mark Sloan."

"Is he…I'm new to the sister thing which is a long and complicated story but I'm new and…is he a good guy?"

"He's…" Derek breathed, rolling his eyes. "Yeah, he's a good guy."

"Okay, the eye roll thing…not very convincing."

"He's…a good guy once you get to know him," Derek sighed. "He flirts, he says stupid things, he's kind of idiot but he has a good heart, he means well and I think he really cares about your sister so he's not bad. I think you will probably like him."

"I don't know," I frowned, because that sounded like a really confusing guy.

"He's good, Mer."

"Mer?"

"I…do you not like that? Because it just slipped out, but I can stick to Meredith if you want," he offered.

"Mer's fine," I nodded slowly. "Just…never actually been called Mer before. But it's fine."

"Okay, Mer," he smiled. "Anyway, Mark's a good guy. He's a little rough around the edges and he's hard to get to really know but he's a good guy."

"Do you have sisters?"

"Four."

"Would you let them date him?"

"That's…that's a really complicated question," Derek frowned. "He's…we all grew up together so him dating my sisters would be weird but he's…don't judge him until you get to know him."

"Okay, now I'm scared," I frowned.

"Don't be," he laughed. "He's great."

"You have to say that, he's your best friend."

"Fine," Derek shook his head. "I'm not exactly sure why you asked me because you're not even listening to me."

"Because I figured you'd be singing his praises and talking about how perfect and amazing he was. I didn't think you'd be all iffy about it. You're iffy about it."

"You'll meet him, Mer."

"Fine."

"So you're in Seattle to stay now?" Derek asked. Chatty, he was really really chatty and it would probably be really annoying if he wasn't so beautiful. He was chatty and beautiful and it was okay, it was actually kind of amazing. I was pretty sure Derek was amazing or something, even if he asked far too many questions about things I had intention of talking about with anyone.

"I…I think so, maybe. It…it depends on things, it depends on…I have things to figure out and it depends but yes, maybe."

"Hmmm…" he breathed. "Good."

"Good?"

"Good," he nodded, pulling into a drive way. "We're here. I'll help you with your bags."

"Oh," I sighed, looking up at the house that my dad, the man I barely talked to had bought for my sister. I didn't even know if my dad knew I was here. Lexie probably wouldn't tell him and I didn't tell him so I was pretty sure that he didn't know and that was good, it was good that he didn't know. I definitely had enough going on without needing my dad to know and that would just be bad.

"You okay?"

"Oh…I…yeah, yeah," I nodded, smiling quickly at Derek as I climbed out of the car slowly.

I wasn't anywhere close to okay, I knew that. But I barely knew Derek and he didn't need to know that. He had no reason to need to know that. I didn't need to talk to him about it because I would talk to Lexie or something and I was here to become okay or something. Derek didn't even know.

Even though, sometime as I walked slowly toward the house, I realized that I didn't just want to tug on Derek's curls mid orgasm. Sitting in the car and talking to him all day sounded pretty perfect too.

Because he made me think that maybe, just maybe my life would work out.

_I'm finding my way back to sanity again_

_Though I don't really know what_

_I'm gonna do when I get there_

**So there's an update from Meredith's pov. Meredith is quite aware of the fact that she's quite certain that Derek is the most beautiful person alive (which he is) and she loves talking to him, conversation just glows. Of course...Mer's also a mess. She's a mess that suddenly met this guy she's extremely attracted to...just after she swore off boys completely. So yes, that is where Meredith is. **

**I will update again on Wednesday. **

**Read. Love. Review**


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: Grey's Anatomy is not mine. But I do believe that it's the first thing on my Christmas list. So if someone wants to get it for me, I'd really appreciate it, ever so much.**

**So here's the next update...a little later than I said it would be but tonight I was alone at work and it was dead so it makes for perfect updating time. And I took advantage. This update jumps back to Derek's pov...while he's jogging with Mark cause that's well...hot.**

**Enjoy!**

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"So what's the story of Meredith Grey?" I asked my best friend who happened to be dating Meredith Grey's little sister.

"Who?" Mark grunted.

We were jogging. I had no idea why I was jogging, I hated jogging. Which was a lie, not the hating jogging part, but the not knowing why. I was jogging because a few months ago Mark had decided if I ever wanted to get laid again I had to stop being so scrawny; which had then led to him dragging me to the gym and making me go jogging at least three times a week with him. Apparently this was going to work. I knew it wasn't, I knew my dad had never been a big man either, but I was pretty sure it wouldn't hurt to get some muscle. Mark seemed to think it would help with the ladies. Not that I was interested in getting ladies. Just one lady would be nice.

Specifically, the blonde one that I had picked up at the airport the day before and I hadn't been able to get out of my head since, even though I was pretty sure she was out of my league.

"Lexie's older sister, Mark."

"Oh," Mark laughed. "Big Grey."

"Big Grey?"

"Yeah," he nodded. "Lexie is Little Grey. Mary or whatever the hell her name is is Big Grey."

"Wait…" I frowned as I ran. "You call your girlfriend Little Grey."

"Only when talking about her in the same sentence as her sister."

"That's…" I groaned. "Beside the point…what is Big Grey's story?"

"Honestly, don't know," Mark shrugged as we paused, running in spot at a stop light. I hated stop lights. I felt like a retard standing and jogging in one spot. "Lexie met her a couple of years ago. She's a half sister or something and they don't know each other too well."

"Oh."

"About a year after they met, Big Grey graduated college and went off to Europe. Lex didn't hear from her again until a week ago, she called and said she was coming to Seattle and needed a place to crash."

"And Lexie just let the sister she barely knows stay with her?"

"Family."

The light turned and we started moving again and I tried really hard to not groan in frustration that had nothing to do with my dislike of jogging. Mark had known nothing, which is something I should have seen coming because very rarely Mark Sloan knew anything but that hadn't stopped me from hoping. Because I couldn't get Meredith Grey out of my head and I needed to know something, I needed to know her. And Mark hadn't told me anything I didn't already figure out for myself. My best friend was useless, he was completely and totally useless.

"Did you talk to her?" I panted as we made our way up a hill.

"Not really," Mark shrugged. "The usual introduction bullshit but she just kind of sat there. Lex kicked me out hoping she'd talk more if I left."

"Mer didn't talk?"

"No, not really."

"Hmmm…." I breathed. "She talked on the ride home. She talked a lot. Must just not like you."

"Everyone likes me."

"She didn't like you," I laughed breathlessly.

"Yeah, well she's…." Mark frowned. "She seems like she's a mess or something, I don't know. She's not a happy person."

"Hmmm…"

"Hot though."

"She is," I murmured, nodding slowly.

"Wait…" Mark snapped slightly, coming to a sudden stop, a blessed stop but sudden all the same. Stopping did seem like a good idea. "You have the hots of Big Grey?"

"I don't have the hots for Big Grey," I rolled my eyes.

"Sorry, forgot who I was talking to," Mark sighed, his voice changing slightly. "You have…feelings for Big Grey?"

"Oh, you're one to talk, you're dating a girl so I don't think that you can groan about me having feelings for anyone anymore."

"But you have feelings for Big Grey."

"I…" I breathed, half from the run and half from the words that had been at the tip of my tongue since I had turned around to see the girl that had been cursing behind me at the airport. I knew the words were possibly quite insane but they weren't leaving me alone, along with her soft giggle and the way she smelled kind of like a flower and the long rambling way she spoke. None of it was leaving me alone which wasn't even exactly a bad thing. It was just a thing and I knew if I said the words Mark would never shut up. But I had taken a long enough pause that if I didn't say it, he still wouldn't shut up. "I think I might marry her."

"What?"

"I think she might be the one."

"Shep, you barely know her," Mark frowned. He had to stop doing that. If he kept doing that he would get frown lines which is something he should probably be the one to think of as he was the one that wanted to be a plastic surgeon.

"I'm aware of that," I nodded slowly, running my hand through my sweat soaked curls. Those weren't going to dry well. "I know I barely know her, I just felt…something."

"Something," Mark rolled his eyes. "That's stupid, Derek, even for you."

"Dad always said he knew with Mom right away."

"Fine," Mark sighed. "But this is…Lex says she's a mess. She doesn't know her well but from what she does know, Big Grey's a mess and you don't need to get involved in that. You're a busy guy and…fine, have a good night with her but she has baggage you don't need."

"You don't know that."

"I know she has baggage."

"Fine, she has baggage but that doesn't mean she's not good for me. Maybe I want her baggage. Maybe I want her to be my mess."

"Shep, you know I love you, but that doesn't even sound like a man speaking."

"I like her, Mark," I sighed. "I know I don't know her but there's something…I like her and I just…I like her."

"Fine," Mark shrugged. "Like her if you want. Wait…you don't expect me to play some fucked up matchmaker, do you? Because it's fine if you like her but I'm not…"

"I don't want you to hook us up. I was just asking what you knew about her which clearly isn't much."

"So I don't have to pass her a note?"

"No. But that proves me theory that you still think like a teenager, so thanks for that."

"Thanks, Shep," Mark groaned. "Can we go back to jogging or do you need to bellyache over a girl longer?"

"I'm done."

"Good," Mark nodded, stretching out his legs. "And I'll…make sure to invite you out anytime she's going to be around or something lame like that. God knows, you need the help."

"You're an ass."

"Do you want me to invite you or not?"

"Invite me," I nodded as we started jogging again.

I was aware of how lame it sounded, tagging along with my brother just so I could get to know a girl better but I was pretty sure it would work. Meredith talked to me. Or she rambled or something but this seemed like my best shot. Because I needed that show. I hadn't lied. It sounded insane but I hadn't lied at all, I was pretty sure that I was going to marry her.

_I see the missing pieces  
I'm searching for  
I think I've found my way home  
I know that it might sound more than a little crazy  
But I believe_

**So Derek wants to marry Meredith. Because Derek believes in true love and all that nice stuff that we know he believes in and he found it all with Meredith. And he knows Mer's a mess....he just doesn't know the details...but well...that's call I can say really. Because those details that he doesn't know is what makes up this fic so yes, shutting up now. **

**I'll probably update Monday or Tuesday. **

**Read. Love. Review.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: My parents have already ruined any surprise and told me they didn't get me Grey's Anatomy for Christmas this year. Neither did my friends. So unless some other lovely person is giving me the show for Christmas...I still don't own it.**

**Sorry for the delay guys! You know how it is with Christmas and all that, I have been kept rather busy but I finally got some time to sit and update, with a house to myself and everything. So yes, sorry it took a bit but it's here now and I really do hope that this update and all it's cuteness makes the wait worth it.**

**Enjoy!**

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"Hello…I mean…Grey…crap, Grey's residence, yeah, Grey residence."

I didn't even try not to smile. I figured it was okay to smile, I was alone. No one was here to see me smile, so it was okay to smile at the voice on the other end of the phone, the voice that sounded overwhelmed and thrown off and more than a little breathless. I called looking for the idiot that I called my brother but I was pretty sure I was hoping to find her, the tiny blonde her that had been on my mind since I had met her the week before. I hadn't actually spoken to her since I had dropped her off and I was definitely looking for her. "Meredith?"

"You…oh…Derek, right?"

"Derek," I nodded even though she couldn't see me, my smile growing wider at the fact she remembered my name. Yes, I know that's lame, I do know that.

"Oh…umm…hi, I…hi," she breathed.

"Hi," I grinned. "I'm looking for Mark. The idiot's not answering his cell and I need to talk to him. Is he there?"

"Oh. He was. He was here and then him and Lexie went somewhere. They went…there was whispering and giggling and then they were gone."

"And now he's not answering his cell. I can imagine what they're doing."

"That's…I'm her big sister, you can't say thing like that to her big sister. I'm not…I'm not an idiot or anything, I know they do things like that because my sister is…she's a grown up but I'm still a big sister and awkward, that's awkward, Derek," she rambled, giggling slightly at the end.

My breath caught in my throat. Which sounded insane because she hadn't really done anything special, she had just rambled and giggled and technically speaking, that should probably be a turn off. I was training to be a surgeon, I should be looking for a woman who spoke in clear sentences. And only little girls were supposed to giggle and actually sound cute doing it, so my breath catching in my throat was insane and I wasn't even sure what did it, if it was the rambling or the giggling because I loved both and all of this was probably a little crazy but I really wanted her to giggle again, because somehow my breath catching in my throat was a really nice, slightly addictive feeling.

"Sorry," I laughed into the phone. "Forget I even suggested it. They're…in a park playing on the swings."

"Swings…swings are kind of dirty, Derek."

"Oh. I didn't…I was…you have a dirty mind. I was making a completely clean suggestion about being around kids, and you…you have a very dirty mind, Meredith Grey."

"Wouldn't you like to know."

Flirting, we were actually flirting. Me and the blonde I couldn't get out of my head were flirting. "Maybe I would."

"Oh…," she giggled. "Well you were the one that brought up swings so maybe it's you."

"With the dirty mind?"

"With the dirty mind," she giggled again and I was pretty sure that was what made my breath catch.

"Wouldn't you like to know."

"Maybe I would."

"So…" I breathed, or tried to breathe. I probably had failed, which was a horrible thing because breathing was supposed to be easy. "How are you enjoying Seattle?"

"I…" she sighed on the other end of the phone. "Does it always rain like this? I mean…I know Seattle is known for rain, rain and coffee but this is kind of crazy because it's rained every day since I got here and my point is, does it always rain this much?"

"It does," I laughed. "Didn't you spend time in England?"

"I did. And it rained but this…I don't think I like the rain."

"Already backing out of Seattle?"

"I didn't say that," she giggled. "I just don't like the rain. Or sometimes I don't like the rain, not this much rain or something."

"You get used to it. I moved here a couple of years ago to do my residency, you get used to it."

"Oh…you're not from Seattle?"

"Manhattan."

"I should have known," she giggled again. She giggled a lot. I definitely didn't remember her giggling this much when I had driven her home from the airport and I would have probably remembered this much giggling because I couldn't quite manage to get it out of my head. "I'm from Boston. Well from here but I moved to Boston when I was young so…from Boston."

"Another East coaster," I smiled. "What made you pick Seattle?"

"That's…my sister and she's here so I…and other things, other big long complicated things that you don't want to hear about but things, and now I'm here and…here."

"Now you're here."

"I am," she murmured.

"Mark says you don't talk."

"What?"

"I asked Mark about you…"

"You asked Mark about me?" she cut me off.

"Oh…" I cleared my throat. Smooth move, Shep. Of all the things to admit to her that was probably somewhere along the bottom list, somewhere around the fact Kathleen and Nancy used to dress me up as a girl. "I asked about you and he…he said you didn't talk so he didn't actually know all that much."

"I…when he comes over I kind of…third wheel…huge obvious third wheels so I just kind of…try to disappear."

"That makes sense," I nodded into the phone even though she couldn't see me. "There's a solution to that you know."

"There is?"

"Hmmm…" I nodded. "You know me. I live with Mark. When he goes over, I could go with him, be a fourth wheel."

"A fourth wheel?" she giggled.

"Yes. You'd still be the third but at least you'd have a fourth."

"That…" she breathed. "That…okay. Okay, you should…come. Come over with Mark and be the fourth wheel or whatever."

"Okay," I smiled widely. "I'll tell Mark I'm tagging along next time."

"Good."

"Good."

Silence fell over us and for some crazy reason it wasn't awkward. This was only me second conversation with her and yet, the silence already wasn't awkward.

"So what are you up to?" she asked, sounding a little unsure of herself.

Hours later I hung up the phone. Hours. We had talked for hours…actually two hours and forty three minutes. The only reason we had even hung up was because Lexie had gotten home. We had talked for hours and I wasn't even sure if I could remember all of it except I couldn't stop smiling. I had called to hear her voice, I had called to remind myself that I hadn't created her in my own mind, just wanting to hear her giggle. And now it had been hours and we hadn't actually talked about anything real, not really. We had small talked, we had small talked for nearly three hours and hanging up had been hell. Which was stupid because Lexie being home meant Mark was on his way home, and I had a surgery the next day that I was supposed to be studying up on except I just wanted to keep talking to her, I wanted to keep talking to Meredith.

_They didn't have you where I come from_

_Never knew the best was yet to come_

_Life began when I saw your face_

_And I hear your laugh like a serenade_

**I don't honestly know what there is to say about this update, besides Derek can't get her out of his head so he's making up lame reasons just to call her. And when he called he just wanted to hear her voice and because they're them...well they talked for hours because that's what they do. Honestly, besides that, don't think there's anything to say. **

**I MAY update this later today...it depends on how other things go...if not, definitely going to shoot for tomorrow. **

**Read. Love. Review.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: I have a work Christmas party to go to tonight...and it may be very lame as well, there's a lot of lame people where I work. However if I owned the show...well Patrick and Eric and Kevin would be at the party...not lame at all.**

**Sorry this has taken a bit longer than I planned...it's been busy with getting ready for Christmas as we're hosting Christmas eve and Christmas day at my house plus both my siblings came back from school so the house is a lot crazier than usual which makes writing a little bit harder so yes, sorry for the delay but here's the update now.**

**Enjoy!  
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"So what do you know about Derek?"

It was a stupid question. It had to be a stupid question. I didn't care what Lexie knew about Derek and the way her head snapped back to look at me and the way her eyes widened and she seemed to forget about the show she was watching kind of confirmed that it was stupid. I didn't like boys like Derek, I didn't ask about boys and I didn't ask Lexie about boys because she was Lexie and it was complicated, it was complicated and messy and stupid, I was stupid. Really really stupid and it didn't matter that Derek kind of sounded like he was flirting on the phone the day before, he probably wasn't and I was an idiot and Lexie was still staring at me strange.

"What...why? Why do you want to know about Derek?"

"I was just…I think I did something stupid," I breathed, staring at my hands that I was wringing together, stupid nervous habit. "He called, he called looking for Mark and we talked and he's…I told him to come over when Mark comes over so I don't feel like a third wheel."

"I told you you're not a third wheel," Lexie frowned.

"I feel like one, and that's…that's not the point, the point is…I told Derek to come over and…what do you know about Derek?"

"Do you…you like Derek?"

"I didn't…I barely know him," I denied quickly, repeating the mantra I had been playing in my head since the phone call. I barely knew him, I couldn't like him. "What do you know?"

"He's a great guy," Lexie shrugged. "A really great guy. Mark and him are like brothers. Umm…his dad died when he was young but I don't know…Mark doesn't talk about that a lot. There are four sisters and the mom and I think they're all really close. I don't actually know that much. I mean, he's Mark's best friend so I only…I've never talked to him a lot."

"Oh," I nodded slowly. "But he's a great guy?"

"He is," Lexie grinned widely. "He's really nice and funny and caring and Mark adores him. Apparently he's the resident to beat which pisses Mark off."

"Mark adores him?" I giggled.

"He does," Lexie nodded. "But don't ask Mark, he'd just deny it and call Derek and idiot but…Derek's a good guy, Mer. He'd be good for you with everything…he's a good guy and everyone needs a good guy."

"He'd be good for me with everything going on in my life."

"Yeah."

Silence fell over us, completely awkward horrible silence which was why talking to Lexie was a horrible awful idea and I tried to avoid it. Or not avoid it because she was my kind of sister and she was letting me live with her even when we barely knew each other so I wasn't avoiding. I was talking to her. I even liked her but I liked her as a friend instead of a sister and I talked to her about stupid things and not a boy and definitely not something that would bring up that one thing I didn't want to talk to anyone about because it was awkward. In so many ways talking to Lexie was a horribly awkward experience and I probably should have just kept my mouth shut. That was probably the best lesson I had to learn, most of the time I should just keep my mouth shut.

"How…how is she doing?" Lexie asked, sounding totally terrified.

"She's…" I breathed. Lexie was the only person that knew. I had been sworn to secrecy but I had to live somewhere and Lexie was the only person that knew so saying something, telling someone, it was probably good or something. "She got lost on her way home from work yesterday. She's been making the drive for years and she got lost. She got really really lost and they aren't letting her cut anymore and she's….depressed or something."

"And they still don't know what's wrong?"

"They…" I took another deep breath. "They…it's a tumor or stress or early on-set Alzheimer's. They don't know but it's…it's something, they don't know."

"Stress…" Lexie nodded quickly. "It's…it might just be stress and that's…you can deal with stress, she could retire and then…okay, Ellis Grey probably wouldn't want to retire."

"No, probably not," I laughed harshly.

"I'm not helping, am I?"

"No, no…not really but you're trying and it's good. You're the only person that knows so it's good that you're trying."

"Okay," Lexie smiled, reaching to grab my hand and squeeze it tight. I liked Lexie. I did. It was complicated and messy and awkward and kind of bad but Lexie was good, she was kind of cool in this really dorky way and she was a good sister like person. I did like Lexie. "So Derek…you like Derek?"

Okay, maybe I didn't like Lexie that much.

"I don't…I don't even know Derek. He's…okay, he's really really attractive, like really stupid attractive with the hair and the eyes but I don't know him."

"But you like him."

"I don't like him," I rolled my eyes.

"So…" Lexie sighed before giggling slightly. "You don't like him…but you want to know more about him and you just randomly invited him to come and hang out while I hang out with my boyfriend?"

"I…shut up."

"You like Derek."

"Shut up."

"You like Derek."

"I…I can't like Derek. I can't. Because I'm me…I'm a mess who's twenty five and I don't even know what I'm doing with my life and I don't like boys. I sleep with boys but I…I don't even do that anymore because it was stupid and messy and it doesn't help me figure out who the fuck I am…so no, no I do not like Derek. I can't like Derek."

"But you like Derek."

"Shut up," I groaned, switching on the tv.

Lexie giggled but she shut up, Lexie was good like that, she was smart or something. Or not smart because I didn't like Derek. I did not like Derek. I was not the type that liked guys like Derek and he definitely wasn't the type that liked girls like me so liking Derek…besides it was all beside the point because I had sworn off boys…any boys so liking Derek wasn't even the point not that I liked him. It was stupid. Liking Derek was stupid and I didn't, Derek was just really good looking and easy to talk to…

And I didn't like Derek.

Stupid sister like person.

_So if my heart just skips a beat_

_What if I lose a little sleep_

**So that update, while short, kind of brought in some parts of this fic that hadn't been mentioned yet...mainly Ellis and Mer's relationship with Lexie. And the whole Ellis thing...well that will be explored a lot and how Mer deals with it...but not being alone like she was on the show and well...you'll just have to wait and see about that. As for Lexie, Mer doesn't have her friends in this fic (at least not yet) and Lexie is all she has and things aren't perfect, but I do believe that even on the show, Meredith really does like Lexie. So that's another thing that will come out in this fic...especially with Mark dating Lexie and Derek and Mark's friendship. Okay I'm done rambling. **

**I'm going to try to update again tomorrow, if not Saturday at the latest probably. **

**Read. Love. Review.**


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: Christmas has come and gone. No one gave me the show. *Sigh* So I still don't own it. Maybe next year I'll be luckier.**

**Sorry for the delay! Christmas kept me busy as it tends to do and then this update ended up being longer than I had planned when I planned it out in my head which all leads to a slight delay. However, you were all looking for some Mer/Der interaction after the last update so here it it!**

**Enjoy!**

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"So let me get this straight…you dragged me through that chick talk, you made me act like a girl to my girlfriend…and then you went and got yourself your own invite?" Mark groaned as we climbed out of my car. "That's not damn fair."

"Well I didn't expect to talk to her," I pointed out. "And she gave me a really good way to invite myself, I couldn't have foreseen that."

"You're an idiot."

"I'm not an idiot," I frowned. I wasn't an idiot, I wasn't an idiot at all. This was actually really smart, or at least it felt smart because it had worked. I was going to see Meredith, the tiny blonde that I couldn't get out of my head and that was all that mattered. It didn't matter that Mark thought I was an idiot. "This is…it's better."

"It's better that you made me act like a girl?"

"No," I rolled my eyes. "Well yes, but that's not…it's better that she invited me. I don't seem like a stalker."

"But you are a stalker."

"You're an idiot," I laughed, shoving my brother's arm and frowning slightly when he didn't move at all. I had to bulk up. I couldn't even push Mark around and I was fighting for a hot girl that could probably have any guy she wanted. This was insane but I wasn't an idiot or a stalker. I just liked listening to her giggle and I liked looking at her and talking to her and all of that was normal. It was normal to do things to let you be around the girl you liked, and I liked Meredith. I had actually asked so definitely not an idiot.

"Wimp."

"Shut up."

"Big Grey's never going to go for you."

"I…just shut up," I shook my head as he pounded on the door. I knew he was right. The only girls that had ever gone for me with my scrawny frame and crazy hair were the bookish types that spent most of their time in the library which made Meredith Grey completely out of my league, even if we had amazingly long conversations on the phone. I knew I was fooling myself coming over here and thinking that she was going to be the girl I was going to marry when really she probably just saw me as some dork that wouldn't leave her alone but that didn't stop me from trying. And at least I got to see her if I came over, even if she didn't want me, I could see her.

I was aware I was sounding emo and depressed but I was about to see the girl I liked, so I was pretty sure it was allowed.

"Mark! Derek!" Lexie exclaimed, smiling widely as she opened the door. "You're here."

"Of course," Mark nodded, kissing his girlfriend quickly.

"We're ready for you," Lexie nodded, leaning into him, her eyes falling on me and I'm pretty sure her smile widened. "Meredith's in the living room if you want to go say hi."

"Great, now you think I'm a charity case," I groaned.

"What? No. No, definitely not. It's cute. You and Meredith, you'd be cute, you two would be adorable and just go say hi."

"Fine," I sighed, because really no one had to fight with me to go see Meredith, even if she was going to shoot me down flat when I eventually worked up the courage to ask her out. Which would happen eventually, it would.

She looked completely different today.

Which was probably a bad thing as I had considered her beautiful when she had been a mess from her rather long flight, but right now she looked even better, sitting on the couch with her legs pulled up under her. She hadn't noticed me walking in, she was too busy staring at the remote like it might do something just by her looking at it so I took the second to drink her in. The blonde hair that had been in a messy ponytail was now falling down around her face in casual waves, and the ratty tshirt had been replaced by a purple sweater and…she looked perfect. She looked annoyed and perplexed but kind of completely perfect.

"Hey," I smiled widely, watching as her head suddenly snapped up, a small smile playing at her lips and I was probably imagining that her cheeks picked up a pinkish blush.

"Hey," she breathed.

"Having problems with something?"

"I…" she sighed, her eyes falling to the remote again. "I'm supposed to be turning on the stupid thing and it's not working or something and I…we're watching movies and having beer and snacks and I can't…oh, crap, do you want a beer?"

"Would love one," I nodded, reaching for the remote. "Give."

"What?"

"Give it to me while you open my beer, I'll figure it out," I shrugged.

"Oh of course," she rolled her eyes and somehow, I kind of loved that she was rolling her eyes at me. "Because you're a man so you know how to work this kind of…stuff."

"I do," I smirked.

"You're going to fail," she giggled, grabbing for a bottle on the table and popping it open.

"Are you insulting my manhood?"

"Maybe."

"I'm glad I came to be abused," I laughed, grabbing the beer from her as I fiddled with the remote, because I was pretty sure that I needed to get this to work.

"That's what you get for being a fourth wheel."

"Hey! If I wasn't here you'd be sitting by yourself, swearing at the remote and waiting for the other two to stop making out in the other room, so you should probably think about who you're insulting," I smiled triumphantly as the DVD flickered to life. "You should be happy I'm here."

"Oh…" she breathed. "I…I am. I'm happy you're here."

"Oh…" I echoed, looking up from the remote to look at her again. She looked different, her eyes drawn down in shyness, her cheeks tinged pink. And something about the soft light of the lamp made her kind of look ethereal, which wasn't even a word I ever used but she did, the way the lamp made her golden hair glow made her look nothing like the girl I had picked up at the airport, she looked ethereal. I shifted slightly, not even thinking of it, just wanting to touch her soft hair, feel her skin beneath my fingers and I had to touch her but my slight movement caused her eyes to snap up, green meeting me. Although they weren't green, in the soft light, gold flecks were jumping out at me. She was beautiful, she was so insanely beautiful and ethereal and my brain was racing. I was a calm, cool, rational surgical intern and the woman beside me was so beautiful that my brain was racing with the need to touch her.

"Okay, we've got the food…woah, did I interrupt something?" Mark's voice snapped me back to reality.

"No…ummm…no," Meredith giggled nervously, shaking her head slightly before turning her attention back to Mark and Lexie. "Der…Derek got the DVD player working so…we're good. We were just…and we're good. Movies. Movies and food and we're good."

"Okay," Lexie frowned slightly, putting down a plate full of food on the coffee table in front of Meredith and I. "Well, I don't know what we should watch first."

"Funny, put something funny on," Mark suggested.

"Baby Mama?" Meredith asked.

"Good choice," I smiled at her, or at least I think I smiled. Smiling was hard to do when you were considering killing your brother for interrupting a perfect moment to touch or do something that you still desperately wanted to do.

"Do you want to show off how big of a man you are again and put it on?" she giggled.

"And there you go insulting my manhood again."

"I am not!" she gasped slightly. "Compliment…I was contemplating your manhood, you got the stupid DVD thingie working, didn't you?"

"DVD thingie?"

"Shut up and put on the movie," she pouted. I hadn't seen her pout before, frown but not actually pout. When she pouted her nose scrunched up and her eyes got darker and she looked so completely adorable that I didn't actually want to move to throw the DVD in the machine because it would involve stopping looking at her and that didn't even feel like an option.

I was pathetic and so in over my head and I was aware of this but I wasn't sure I could help it or even if I wanted to.

"I'll get it, Shep," Mark groaned, moving to grab the Blockbuster case off the floor. "Fucking woman."

"I…I was going to do it," I frowned. "Patience."

"Yeah yeah."

"Be nice and just put it on Mark," Lexie sighed. "And you two, help yourself to the food. It's just munchies and stuff so…start munching or whatever."

"Thanks, Lex," I grinned.

"Meredith helped," Lexie shrugged. "She…she can't cook but she…she can work the oven so she helped."

"Thanks, Mer," I smiled, looking over at her again, which was probably a bad idea as I was really trying to not look at her and act slightly like the normal person that I knew I had the ability to be.

"You're welcome," she breathed.

"Now shut up so we can watch the movie," Mark sighed, grabbing for his own beer as he sat down, pulling Lexie onto his lap.

"Shutting up," I nodded, stealing a quick glance at Meredith before turning my attention to the movie. This was good. We weren't touching, we weren't even close to touching but this was nice. I still hadn't managed to get Meredith out of my head so it was nice to sit with her and be with her. The fourth wheel thing had worked out and maybe…we could laugh or something and end up sitting closer which would be nice, even though the thought sounded more than a little dorky in my head. I was pretty sure Meredith Grey made me feel like I had never actually done this before, and I had. I had dated before. I had actually dated plenty, I had just never wanted to date anyone like Meredith.

Because she was something completely different than every girl that had ever noticed me.

And because I was pretty sure she was it.

"I love Tina Fey," Mark laughed as I leaned forward to grab a jalapeno popper from the plate just as Meredith leaned forward to grab the same one, our hands finding each other's instead.

"Oh…" she breathed, pulling her hand back quickly. "Sorry."

"It's okay," I murmured, looking quickly at Mark and Lexie, whose eyes were still glued to the screen. "Ladies first, you can have it."

"I don't think anyone has ever called me a lady before," she giggled.

"Now that's a shame," I smiled, grabbing for the jalapeno popper we had both grabbed for and handing it to her, smiling wider as our fingers brushed against each other.

"Th…thanks," she whispered.

Our eyes met again, the golden light in her eyes being slightly muted by the light the television was now emitting. But somehow, I still had no desire to move or to look away. She was beautiful. She was tiny and delicate and ethereal and mainly just beautiful. I barely knew her and yet somehow, I had fallen so deep and so fast that I couldn't even manage to look back the television to see what was happening on the movie. It was sad and pathetic and maybe Mark was right and I was a woman, because all of my thoughts were far too cheesy to be anything close to manly, but somehow the golden flecks in her eyes and the soft way she smiled made it impossible to look away.

Mark and Lexie suddenly laughed loudly at something on the screen.

Meredith blinked at the noise, shifting her head to look at them as I moved back to lean back against the couch, sitting closer to her than I had been before.

_I could sit for hours_

_Finding new ways to be awed each minute_

_Cause the daylight seems to want you_

_Just as much as I want you_

**So...Derek's plan has worked and he has found himself with Meredith, being forced into a situatiion where it really is the two of them and he's basically just left in complete and total awe of her every five seconds because he likes her that much. However, this is young Derek so he's still a little on the dorky side, because Derek is a dork and he has no idea what to do but well..yeah. I think if I keep going I'll give you guys spoilers so shutting up now. **

**I'm going to try to update tomorrow but if not tomorrow definitely something on Thursday. **

**Read. Love. Review.**


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